Four of the Most Awful Jersey Horror Films Ever Made
Every year come Halloween Bill Doyle and I have at least one debate about the merits of Night Of The Living Dead, a ground-breaking horror flick from the late 60's that started the zombie movie genre and some say the slasher genre. It was low-budget with bad sound and questionable acting by some of the cast, yet it stands as one of the creepiest movies of all time. That's my opinion. Doyle will tell you quite the opposite.
Yet horror fans everywhere could, I think, agree that the four movies listed here have to be universally laughed at. They're all either based in Jersey or were at least partially shot in Jersey. They're also all horror movies, allegedly. And another thing they have in common, they're all truly awful. So awful, you will be laughing at these trailers.
Let's begin with The Undertaker. A 1988 movie set in a small Jersey town. The plot as described by IMDb.com..."A deranged undertaker kills various people to keep as his friends in his seedy funeral home." It received only a 5.0 out of 10 user rating, which when you see the trailer I think you'll find generous.
Frankenhooker. A 1990 horror sci-fi film that at least owns up to being partially a comedy (but doesn't seem to recognize it is entirely a comedy). The plot on IMDb.com? "A medical student sets out to recreate his decapitated fiancee by building her a new body made of Manhattan street prostitutes."
User rating a 6.1 out of 10. They're laughing at you Frankenhooker, not with you.
The Prowler is a 1981 disaster with terrible acting and lots of dimly lit scenes and a shower scene that doesn't quite live up to Psycho. IMBb.com's plot description and user rating..."An unkown killer, clad in World War II U.S. Army fatigues, stalks a small New Jersey town bent on reliving a 35 year-old double murder by focusing on a group of college kids holding an annual Spring Dance." 6.1 out of 10.
Finally there's Don't Go In The House. This total debacle came out in 1979 and is described on IMDb.com as "A disturbed young man who was burned as a child by his sadistic mother stalks women with a flamethrower." Oh. THAT old plot. 5.7 out of 10. And this trailer might be the funniest of them all.